I’m bleeding out of my face. Picking at my thumbs in a fit of almost unprecedented anxiety. My eyes are dry, my throat is dry, I’m a little bit high. Everything is fine so far for us I guess. I’ve been thinking about divine purpose and trying to minimize and share more and love my partner and life. I got a sweet post card in the mail the other day from my high school friend, Molly. It made me smile, I wish I had the bandwidth to write back.
I need to buy stamps. I am forcing myself to write. Why did I have to be alive right now in 2020? It’s difficult, it feels peak evil and I cry too much. I am painting something though. For a new friend. May we recieve great energy for each other during this pandemic and period of hopelessness for those of this land. Through gifts. And plants.
I don’t know a world through the lens of anything else but craziness. It’s in my family, my blood, my experiences. It feels unrelatably fragile to be so deeply hurt and affected by a word used outside of the context of a personal attack.
I don’t know where else to go but stand right here and love in this world of hate. This kitten would really love some attention now. I am sending all the good things to you!