I made it. 31. I feel confident, for a change. The first time? Up for debate. I feel comfortable, not confident. I guess there’s a difference to distinguish. And so, at 5:30am after kissing my partner goodbye. That’s my powerful human body.
I lit 12 candles across the kitchen table. 4 Incense sticks. Set my camera on auto-timer and took a seat. This is me. If I die soon, who cares. I don’t care. Take me back whenever, universe. Just make sure my son is taken care of and that I love him eternally.
What a shitshow this year has been for everyone. How calm and chaotic it has been for me, personally. I want to buy stamps and write more letters but my hand cramps up and I never feel my words are worthy of the cost of a stamp. I should fix my attitude and my car and just go get stamps.
I haven’t had my own “job” since October, when I quit, again. I have exactly enough energy to raise my child. No more, no less. And so I left. This gives me a lot more time and energy to do things that matter more and it has become evident that that includes trying to be a better friend and there for individual human beings.
More on that later. I am going to get another glass of water.
Stay Hydrated & Fight for Justice 🙂