A gentleman in Idaho bought this painting from me 4 years ago, back in 2019. I couldn’t tell you his name, but I remember that he was very fast paced with curly dark hair, and he had a car dealership. He told me I should focus on bigger paintings. “They would be easier to sell.”, He said. Ever since this interaction, I’ve focused more on larger canvases.
I also committed to more detail and less low time investment / stress paintings.
Sometimes I think about paintings I have sold to people and fully recognize their obvious incompletion. I daydream about being able to have them back to finally finish and then return to whatever wall or Goodwill had them.
I feel like I’ve produced a bunch of ghosts.
This is my current thought process, and it is the reason you may have noticed I completely swept up the art that I have kept on this website. Now the website itself feels so empty and pointless.
I suppose I am going through some sort of a conflict about it. Someone was willing to spend money on this painting, no matter how many years ago. Just because I’ve suddenly become so moody and hyper critical, does that really mean that another person’s enjoyment is invalid?
Only a few short years later and looks so obviously incomplete to me now. It looks like I don’t care. I guess this is what it means to grow old, to desire more intent and focus to be evident in the things that come from my hands.
I don’t feel proud enough of my art, and that’s become a problem.
If you are reading this, and you have and /or purchased a painting from me please email me a photo of it. Let me look at it, I have such a huge army of ghosts out there. I woke up today wanting nothing more than to chase them.
I’m back into the swing of actively posting for now. There’s just something about TWO toxic train derailments in the U.S. recently that makes me want to vent. There’s more, of course. There is always more, but this is the nail in the coffin containing my silence.
And so, here I am, sharing space with you. As I process my feelings and update you on what they look like on canvas, the world continues to spin. Bad things continue to happen.
So, what happened with all of this talk of a train derailment and toxic chemicals, anyway? On February 3rd, a train derailedin the village of East Palestine, Ohio. Ever since then, an absolute shit show has continued unraveling for all to see across the livestreamed internet.
And it doesn’t seem like enough people are talking about it.
Try as they may, social media cannot keep hiding the reality of the Ohio Train Derailment.
A reporter was actually ARRESTED for being among the first to report. Dead fish, cattle and chickens being reported 100+ miles away from ground zero. What is this going to look like in the long term, and why isn’t the U.S. government being transparent about it?
Just as the topic started gaining traction, BOOM!
Another derailment in Texas with even more chemicals and what will eventually become lifelong negative effects for anyone living along the waterways where these chemicals are being dumped.
This is what happens when deregulation and pay to play become the only form of partisanship. It is ridiculous!
I’m here, and I’m fucking tired of being pissed! Surely our collective human energy can be used to hip check the malevolent nature of the modern world. There are things in this life worth protecting. Especially life itself.